Cultural Weekend

Did I mention we immersed ourselves in cultural pursuits this past weekend? Well we most certainly did, proving A's gentle cribs all wrong, "We never see anything".

The weekend activities were kick started by the bandaloop project performance on Friday evening. We reached Connaught Place to a packed inside and no room to stand outside. We still managed to find a nook to fit our foursome in and caught glimpses, excellent at that, of the fabulous show that was being put up. For those who have no clue, Project Bandaloop is a group that performs in theaters, on buildings and many many incredible settings. Incredible because- how the hell can a group of people be coordinated dancing on the side of the LIC building, 15 storeys higher than ground, suspended by wires while it's difficult not to be Tommy two toes on ground for most of us! (Tommy two toes...sounds cool!) Anyway check out their website for more interesting stuff on these guys.

Saturday was the day of many things- which ones should be chosen- big dilemma!
So we chose Bookaroo, a book festival for children being held the IGNCA. A took K to the event. Most of the activities were geared towards older children but K still had fun. Although A did say the french illustrator was no great shakes. He must be a great at his job but terrible at interacting with children. So we did what we do best and with great passion- bought books.

We decided to give the french mela a miss- sniff sniff!

What we did go for and did not want to miss at all was the evening performance at the Old Fort- the Manganiyar Seduction. It was an absolutely amazing show and have already written about it. Check out their website as well, actually am not too sure if they have one!

Sunday was the taking it cool day with a stroll in Lodhi Gardens, lunch at the club with friends and then a trip to my parents.

The weekend ended on a not so great note with my squabbling with A just before his flight early next morning to Bombay.

All's well that ends well? I don't know what to say!

The Manganiyar Seduction

Boy what a show! It was truly fabulous.


After many bickering sessions, we finally decided we were going to this show I had accidentally read about and what everyone was talking about already- trust us to be the least informed of the lot! Apparently this musical had travelled the globe and had been brilliantly received by all. Its most recent performance was last week in New York.


So kids in tow, dinner packed, jackets worn and much later than I had wanted to or originally planned, we set out for the Old fort where the performance was to take place. Of course we very nearly didn't go- fight over parking etc. Anyway jumping the unpleasant bit, we finally are in the stands- we had bought the cheapest tickets to stand around. guess what, they turned out to be as good as the most expensive ones as we were standing up close and personal to the stage- the only difference being that they were sitting while we stood around.


The show started late and the children found the novelty of being out so late(8 p.m.) wearing off, we were just hoping for it to start. It did. What an amazing show. The music was excellent and the conception as well. The musicians- I counted at least 32, were all sitting in lit up rectangles inspired by the peep show windows of Amsterdam. The whole arena was plunged into darkness and the lights would go up only in the performing window. It was beautiful - I know I have mentioned it already. And of course there were powerful vocals, great instrumentation and even better coordination.


The music of the manganiyars is not strange to us. Far from it, in fact. A and I used to love listening to it ages ago and loved it even then. There were all the typical instruments one would expect from a Rajasthani folk musician- khamancha, murli, been, dholak and many more.


K slept in the middle of all the noise while A little sat right through the end.


If one can, one should definitely see it!

So easy to let go!

Believe me it is!

The past week has been terrible for me and I'm sure I have made it terrible for A as well. Reached my lowest point on Tuesday- crashed in B's house where she literally put me to bed. Felt as if I had gone to the other side. Nothing touched me anymore- not A, not my children, nothing.
It's numbing and you feel that if you completely stop feeling everything, it's not a bad place to be. You are not happy but you certainly are not sad. Or maybe you are and just too exhausted emotionally. I have been to that place where all you do is take a step into the abyss and you are free. Except you are not...not by a long shot.

My bling/diamonds/bags are better than yours!

Yes, that was the question haunting most women, a large number of whom I'm sure haven't recovered from the shock of finding their match.

Well it all started with a match, so to say!
It was the VV school track and field meet for junior school. At 9 we were at the school along with a whole lot of parents. What was so reassuring to see was not just the kids having so much fun, but the mothers dressed to the hilt!!! Yes sir, spotted on the ranks were hip moms dripping jewels, hipper moms with bright blue shadow and mascara (it was after all a super cool event) and the hippest were the track suit sporting women- the track suits of course were all of the same fashion brand, all suede or some such luxurious fabric and all in all colours. I could only say wow!
There were some regular women in jeans, I hope they didn't feel out of place knowing they had fallen short by not wearing the coolest outfit from their wardrobes.
It will take me some time to know that I am not doing my little boy a great service by turning up in my non branded track pants (definitely not suede) sans the matching mascara.
But I do have an original 'coach' bag- courtesy my younger sister, while the fake bag ladies hope to hell that the ones they carry will bear any amounts of scrutiny from the seemingly 'plain janes' like yours truly!

Pleasantly surprised!

I truly was this afternoon on the way back from my mother's house. It was as usual a busy ring road and we were moving on when we were forced to come to an almost crawl. The reason for this became clear as we moved ahead- a roadside food vendor had upped all his wares in the middle of the road. The poor guy sat looking at a complete loss and so desolate. Almost at the same time that the thought crossed my mind, we saw the car in front of us- a 7 series BMW my husband tells me, stop with the driver beckoning the sad guy. He took out a Rs 500 note and without a word gave it to the guy. The latter was probably so blown away, he couldn't say a word. All this happened in less than 20 seconds.

We were ever so pleasantly surprised to see this act of generosity? charity? It's good to know that good people exist. It would be a totally different discussion on whether the person was inherently good or just trying to metaphorically 'wash his sins with acts of kindness'. For us, it was and still enough to know that someone helped someone else at a really low points in their life.

Socialising

I am not  a social butterfly, far from it. But still managed to meet up a lot of people from our past- college friends, school friends and some not from the past- parents from the school and so on. It was great, just to meet people and to know all the fab work they are doing. Almost inspiring!

A little sad, a lot lost!

Yes I am.

Ever since I went for my very first 'session' with the well known Dr Sanjay C, I have been have been having a real tough time trying to get my crying bouts down to more acceptable levels.
Not that I have a tremendous amount of help from anyone- no, not even A. Please don't get me wrong. He is the best man anyone could hope for...there is a but...not the perfect listener. Well, he is not a listener by a long shot. Which makes me more frustrated when he is back home- I then have minimum 3 people to listen to. Which basically means I have no one who will listen to me- which is not too bad, is it? Which is why such an intimate detail of my life gets shared on a public forum.
Which also reminds me- how will I feel about this blog after about a year or so?

So the doc says I have clinical depression and I should start taking some drugs before it gets bad. I don't want the medication- but I do want help. I want a break from this BS life, FAll people and I want people to not bother me. Didn't ever think that I would crumble after only about 12 years of being married.!

Vasant Valley Founder's Day

Today was for grandparents. Kabir was absolutely fabulous!
My parents could not go as my mother has a fractured leg; my parents-in-law couldn't be bothered. so we didn't even ask him this time. The last two times we invited them they didn't even bother acknowledging the invitation or even suitably letting the child down.

It started raining in the afternoon just as we were getting into the car- not a very good omen. I started raining nice and proper within 5 minutes and then just didn't let up. Nobody thought the function would take place, not the organisers themselves when A dropped K to school. Well we hung around the mall to grab a coffee and went back.

The rain let up, the show happened. It was nice. And again K was fabulous. I am the mother so I would be raving about his performance. But he was easily the best performer- the others just didn't have their hearts into it! I am so proud of him.

And am also glad that he is a part of this school which does not insist we buy the costume that K wore- they offer for us to buy it as a memento! Also all the costumes have been made in school itself. Wow!

Quick Bake Dinner

So, it was the day before and I was at a complete loss on what to make. I had to make something and it could not be just anything. It had to be tasty (for my children), nutritious and fun looking. Plus quick- I had to go with my mother to the doctor's. So here's what I made:

Quick Bake Vegetables

• Take stock of what's in the fridge
• I got baby corn, potatoes, spinach, onions, corn kernels, lots of cheese
• Also got grated cauliflower- had prepared it for paranthas earlier
•  Cut the assorted vegetables into whatever shapes you want
• In a wok, put a dash of olive oil and add some garlic and any herbs you want- I used chives and lots of za'atr
• Put the onions and whatever vegetables you have for about 5 minutes
• Grease a baking tray and preheat the oven for about 15 minutes
• In a bowl add about 1 cup refines flour, 50 gms butter and the veges from the wok- mix
• Put the whole thing in the tray and grate cheese and cover the whole thing- we love it generously
• Bake for about 30 minutes
• Enjoy

Unfortunately my older boy just didn't like it and preferred to sleep hungry (a mother and son tiff) than eat my food :-(

But my younger boy loved it and had quite a bit. When I had it, it tasted great even though by then it was only lukewarm. 

Try it...you never know. I will repeat it and take my chances with K the next time as well!

KNEE REPLACEMENT-NIET OR KNEE YET?

My poor mother's in a lot of pain. It's a different matter that she's been in a lot of pain for most of her adult life for one reason or another. But this one has been the bane of her life for a very long time now-her knees.  These disloyal members of her physical being have kind of decided to give up on her. She's mostly grinned and bore the pain. But now, after a particularly taxing time with my sister's around, my amazing mom has developed what is called a stress fracture. And that makes her almost completely immobile.

A trip to two different surgeons had the same result- an insistence on knee replacement surgery. After a detailed discussion with the doc, I am still not convinced that this is the best course of action.

Any ideas?

I am not Vir S’s Friend ☹

Yes, it’s true. I am no friend of his. If I had been, he might’ve addressed my woes regarding my stay at the Tea Bungalow in his writings! If he could dedicate a whole issue of a weekly column to his friends’ unfortunate experience at a fast-food-coffee-joint, he could certainly write ‘A’ line, ONE SINGLE line about my horrible experience. Okay, I grant him the fact that he doesn’t know if I am not just trashing the place, he doesn’t know whether to trust me- after all there must be a million nut jobs like me, plaguing the poor guy with emails of their terrible experiences.

Just imagine Mr. S sitting en face his brand new Apple, just itching to do some quality writing. But what does he get? He gets mail after mail of crazy people like yours truly, wanting just two minutes of his time, wanting just a mention in his column, knowing- once that happens all the wrongs they have suffered will be righted.

The reality in all probability is completely different. And in this one he or his assistant just hits the delete button every time, they see a mail with the subject, “Help Me!”

Now I am sad...or just plain mad.

Sunday Brunch Jinxed

I totally believe it. Why else would we not be able to repeat our fabulous experience? We had a couple of great runs. And after that, nothing! Nada. Zilch.
I guess somewhere down the line we forgot that we had this fabulous tradition that we'd started. I don't know when we go back to it. But I am waiting impatiently for a restart, and I am sure so is the rest of my family.

Nanking, New Delhi

So, in an effort to patch things up (I'm assuming), my younger sister sends me a text asking me about the day's plans. Great. We decided to meet at Nanking, this Chinese restaurant in Vasant Kunj which we'd really enjoyed the last time we were there, which was 10 years ago and which still enjoys the patronage of the friends who'd taken us there.
We reach on time, all of us including A who biked it from work. And the food after so many recommendations turns out to be...plain. Well that's what it was not just plain crap, because it was just short of it, not just plain underdone- because it was just short of it; it was just plain. And not nice plain, 'original Chinese plain', it was tasteless plain. And so much so that the vegetable noodle soup I had ordered turned out to be boiled water with some noodles and one strand of some vegetable thrown in. I must've been feeling really down (I have a bad cold) that I just let it all pass.

What really gets me is the fact that there were so many people paying so much money to eat plain crap (or just short of it). Why would they do that? Because they obviously don't know better and most would be embarrassed to say a word. Which also reminds me of a conversation with an acquaintance at the Delhi Gym this eve- we do sneak a drink more regularly when the boys are out cold! This gentleman returned his 'single malt' because it wasn't so. He made the bar guys open a new bottle. Till some time ago, I had no clue what the difference between a single malt or plain whiskey was. And even now, I barely have an idea. But great to know that people do.

While I would definitely not be palmed off bad wine in 5 star restaurants for something life changing just because it was a fancy place, I did allow bad Chinese food to be served to me this afternoon. It feels bad. But the upside, I think I might've reconnected with my sister.

Janna Gur

I am hooked. The best present this Diwali has been a gift from the upstairs neighbours- a cookbook by the well known Israeli chef- Janna Gur. I love it. More than a cookbook, it is also a book about cuisine origins, food customs. great restaurants and more. I already tried a brilliant dip from the book and will share it right away.
Popularly known as Baba Ghanoush, in the book it's called the roasted eggplant and tahini dip.
Here's how to make it:

• 1 roasted eggplant- flame roasting is best
• 1 tablespoon tahini
• 1/2 cup yoghurt
• 2 cloves garlic- pounded
• 2 tablespoons lemon juice
• Salt and pepper to taste
• Mix all the above for a delicious dip

It was so fab that we finished it in one sitting. Try it. It never sounded so easy :-)

Tweet Tweet Cho Chweet

I guess the full import of this title is for the Indian audience only...for the rest, it is "TWEET TWEET" only.
Finally and after a lot of persuasion by my darling husband, I am on Twitter. So my millions of followers can just go to " Mala_Madness" on twitter where people and actual people are reading me.
Imagine someone in Timbuktu going home from college:
Young Adult: Ma, guess who I discovered on Twitter today?
Ma: Who? What r u so excited about?
Y A: Mala, that's who and finally she's TWEETING! You will not believe her writing- she's so good at it. You must read her Ma.
Ma: Yeah sure, she and a million others!

He He He.

No title!

I can't believe I have not written for the last so many days. Diwali time, so have been busy. A recap is in order. So here it goes.

4th nov: Diwali party for the children at Rabani's. Got there all decked up in my beautiful 'diwali' saree- the one I wear sometime or the other for diwali. So there I am, as soon as I enter, a wave of sadness hits me. The house is looking great. There are flowers, nice kiddie music, great food- it's her own household! And I think, when do I get this? So I sit there missing A, managing A and K, feeding popcorn to A on the trampoline when K rams full force into my arm. And then I start screaming, in pain, nearly pass out and everyone thinks I'm having fun. So it takes people about 30 seconds to realise all is not well. So, long story short- I nearly escaped getting my arm snapped in two.It still hurts. So A stays at home, I pass out with sheer pain and depression and then we start cleaning.
Of course my mother in law has to be a complete $#@$# about getting the room cleaned while we were gone!
I can't believe I actually let this spiteful old woman run/ruin my life.

And then A ad I take the kids out to food. We had a great time.

Next morning Diwali day, we have great breakfast. And this of course has to be ruined by this jealous old woman who can't bear it if A and I are happy together. Push comes to shove and for the first time, I give her a piece of my bloody mind. She comes to room to apologise. But of course, this is after I am plunged into the depression I am trying so hard to get out of. I make an ass out of herself- I start crying. And now Diwali is ruined.

So I call up my younger sister- I have been doing that every single day of the week, to find out what the plans were. And we decide to meet up at Humayun's Tomb. We get there, and I am thinking, it's still so awkward with these guys. It's as if we are meeting strangers, so polite and so no interested. And as for my younger sister- that's material for another post.

So we get back home and start lighting up and decorating. Then made everyone have a shower and sit down for puja, for which last year the whole house had gathered- this year no one except Neha...and very reluctantly the above mentioned woman.
Surprisingly it was the best puja I had done in years. Post the puja, we lit up all the candles and the oil lamps and it all looked very beautiful.

We went to my parents' house and meet my elder sister who's just landed in the morning from the U.S. Her children are wonderful, her husband as well and we meet warmly enough. At least we exchanged a hug- my younger sister and I have yet to exchange a 'hi', let alone 'happy diwali'. And I am saddened by it all, all over again.
The easy camaraderie between my sisters and their husbands and their children- wow, where and how and why did my family stay excluded from all of it?
I guess the joke is on my father, who all his life was excluded from his own family- curses them till today , let the exact same situation happen in his own home. And what has my mother been calling for? the taxi's not here! the rooms need to be booked! this needs to be done. I am the idiot who runs around with two small children and then gets to know of the fun that everyone had, much much later.

And then today A went to work- saturday and after diwali.
And my maid called and was being funny- I think she's quit.
And my driver called in and tried to lie his way not to come in!

These are the days of my life.

Diwali Woes Etc

Not too much to say here except somehow I still haven't lit a single diya. I just don't seem to have it in me this time. For my children and my wonderful husband, I will still make the effort!

Happy diwali to all!!!

From Here To Agra

Here = New Delhi
Agra = Agra

Ha! My attempt at being funny. From here to Agra is normally 3 hours and some odd minutes. From here to Agra, it took my sister 6 hours and more than 30 minutes!
It all depends on when you leave a place to reach your destination. We are almost fanatical when it comes to timing our departure. We want empty roads devoid of truckers, mad interstate bus drivers and equally mad city folk trying to race you to the next bottleneck or traffic jam. We want to see the sun come up when we've already left the city way way behind. We want to reach our destination as early as possible to get as much of the day as is possible.
We are greedy- we want it all!!!

Which is why I can't understand why people will knowingly subject themselves to all the above. I can be politically correct and say- to each his own way; but I am a genetically politically incorrect person. So I will say, get more out of your trip- enjoy it a bit more- get out of your bloody house on time!!!

Pear Crumble

So yesterday when I ask K what he wanted for breakfast, he says pear crumble. He got it for dinner in the evening, right after spinach and corn pasta. So here's how I made it:

• Wash and quarter pears- about a kilo
• Mix together 150 gms refined flour (maida), 100 gms butter (use any kind) and 100 gms caster sugar (personally speaking, I have used regular sugar as well and it works)
• Arrange the pears in a round baking tin and cover it nicely with the above mix
• Preheat oven for 15 minutes at 180
• Bake in oven for about 30 minutes
• Serve with or without fresh cream
• It is yummylicious!!!!

Aaj Jaane Ki Zid Na Karo!

This unbelievably beautiful rubaii by the legendary Farida Khannum, got me the day with my husband today!
I sang it and just like that he said he won't go to work. It's a different matter that we didn't spend half the day together- he went for some bike stuff and I went to get Kabir back from school. By the time I got back, it was already 2 and then we tried to hook up with my sister and her husband.

Farida Khannum rocks!