Economist- 25th anniversay issue

That's another wow. It's an amazing collection of very well written articles by a whole array of people/experts. Makes you look at some very basic issues and takes them places and breaks down some very complicated thoughts into ideas that are easily digested by the brain. Brain food for sure!

Both Sides Now- Joni Mitchell

Some people are truly blessed with the gift of writing amazing songs. And this truly ranks as my number one song of all times.
I have a lot of music by J M and yet this one shines through most of her work- and it's a lot of work.
How can some people write such brilliant song, putting YOUR feelings into THEIR words; writing about what you are feeling and give such soul stirring music to go with it? Just shows we all go through variations of the same situations and experience a roller coater of same emotions in varying degrees of intensity. WOW...I can't even write a post everyday after going through a full day with my two.

AM I BITTER?

I seriously hope not.

Was just thinking about it...going through my previous posts. I seriously do not want to become the person I myself would hate. But I think, there's hope for me yet. Not all my posts are vituperative. Some are funny- even if I myself say it so!!!

My travel Map from the Trip Advisor

1. Amritsar, India
2. Baga, India
3. Bangalore, India
4. Jaipur, India
5. Kangra, India
6. Jodhpur, India
7. Kasauli, India
8. Leh, India
9. Kumarakom, India
10. Kochi (Cochin), India
11. McLeod Ganj, India

• View my profile
• Create your own travel map or travel blog
• Airline tickets comparison at TripAdvisor

Of terrible Tempers and ruined breakfasts!

 I did that…with my  terrible temper, which I just can not control, ruined everyone’s Sunday morning breakfast.

So what if A hesitated before putting some food in my plate- it’s called consideration for others, which is so ingrained in him. I just needed that and of course the fact that the boys had been fighting since the morning and crying and screaming and it’s all happening in just one room! I just lost it- threw the food- something I am terribly ashamed of and wrecked a perfectly beautiful Sunday morning.

So A says, why can’t we just stay in one room and make the best of things…

I am sad...

Searching…for a little piece of land!

The thorn in our backsides, the never ending search for a suitable place, the location of which, the construction of which, the facilities of the area match up or even come a little close to our current address.

The only thing I wanted was to stay here, in Jor Bagh. Neither A nor I wanted a dime off anyone; all we wanted was to bring up our children in this little piece of heaven in this city fast becoming a hot pot of  crime and crap.

I didn’t grow up here, which is why I know exactly what it’s worth.

A grew up here, which is why, he knows exactly what it’s worth.

Then how come, no one else admits the truth? Because they don’t have the balls, that’s why.

How come, A’s dad now refuses to move having frittered away what wasn’t even his to begin with? How come, a man who is so cautious with his own flesh and blood to the point of downright distrusting them, trusted a stranger and a builder at that with the only thing he had of any value? How come when now he so desperately covets this area, could he not want his own children to enjoy the beauty of it? How can anyone, anyone hate his own children so much?

I have never had the great luck of meeting people like my in laws

These are the kind of people we used to laugh at. And now others laugh at us. I would not give undue importance to what other people have to say about what’s not their business, but the thought of being considered a complete ‘con’ and an ass#@$ only by association, makes me cringe! In truth, it’s the thought that I or A failed to change this clearly idiotic and self destructive course of action on the part of his parents, is most saddening.

And the courage of his folks to ask us to leave just makes me laugh and cry at the same time. What nerve! With no thought for us or our little babies, his parents keep coming up with one horrible option after another, all of them involving our displacement from this little piece of heaven which in the non private state of our house, also becomes a little bit of hell everyday.

If you find this all very confusing, trust me not more than me. All I can do is pray…eat, pray, love? The only thing missing in action- love! 

So why blog?

I ask myself this question many many times.
If I write JUST FOR ME, why do I look at the stats, the first thing I log in to my account. Evidently, I would like people to read me, and not just that, to like what I have written and then maybe to leave a comment :-)...
And quite naturally I feel a bit, just a teeny tiny bit let down when I see the number of hits.
It's a great outlet for me, and my emotions...so do I really want to share? Or be bothered about the number of reads?
So, why blog?

Wow...Are All foreigners like this? No only on Delhibabies!

Voila, here it is again- the question of maids and what the poor foreigners think about us terrible Indians. And, politically incorrect as I am, here's my reply. Do try and imagine the mails to which this I am hoping is the last trail:




I, an Indian, completely 'local', just want to request all to please 'verify from their maids who they might be recommending for a job whether or not they would deign to work with Indians, local or not'.

And Mr Tapper, do write to me or the group whenever you find the answer to the very profound question that you have raised, perhaps showing me the ugly truth about me- having not a clue about me or my background!!!(of course you must have taken into account simple economics)

And for all those who are getting all het up at this very simple request of mine, I do believe someone was furious not too far back at an e-mail/discount/invitation not extended to all 'expats', only americans...so please for once put urselves in our lowly places and get a taste of rude staff.

AND all those who feel terrible at the inhumane treatment of household staff by Indians, my only consolation is that you will heading home sooner or later where you will be completely rid of this topic once and for all.

AND to end this note, I thank God, I have had the pleasure of meeting SOME really good 'expats' in India and abroad, most of whom are very good friends of mine; or else I would've thought forever that all foreigners are racists...please excuse me those who truly are not!
Evidently, most members of this group haven't had the same pleasure- that of making some real Indian friends.

Warmest Regards

Mala Datta

THE PROFESSIONAL CHEF AND THE ONE WITHOUT THE...

I do realize that the title of this one is a bit confusing.
But the simple act of buying the first- a professional tome published by the CIA (he he- the Culinary Institute of America) becomes a big deal as the second one is out there to confuse you.
Which is what happened to my dear husband when he went out looking for the former for my birthday. The second book, which has the same title sans 'the' was offered him everywhere. This particular edition has been written by a top Indian chef Arvind Saraswat and is considered something of a legend.
Why then, would a legend knowingly aim to misguide people. His book, like the other one is supposed to be a reference for students of the hospitality industry. I am absolutely sure he knows of the existence of THE Professional Chef. Why then would he call his book: Professional Chef? To ride on the popularity and credibility of the other. Or it could be that, being Indian, he thought that if one title could be lucky for one when why not him? Did he honestly believe that it really does not matter or that no one would notice or know the difference? Does it not reflect upon him, as a person?
I believe it does. And I seriously am going to peruse his book as well and tell you in great detail whether it matches up or not.
As far as layout, photography, techniques, aesthetics are concerned, I can tell you right away- Professional Chef is not a patch on THE P C!

I WANT...

To do something.
To do something meaningful.
To do something BIG.

After going through a whole gamut of emotions including deep dark depression, I now want to do something and make it big. But what can I do? I don't really know. Sixteen years of full time radio, five years of being a full time mother and the same of being a disgruntled, bitchy daughter-in-law.
But as I would write in my c.v.: hardworking, loyal to a fault and ready to learn ANYTHING.

Happy Birthday To Me!

I turned 36 yesterday.
A gave me everything I would've wished for, including this Macbook, but and the only thing missing was more time spent together. We were together all the time...just want some us time now.
Time to preen...my birthday gifts:

macbook
the professional chef
professional chef
and a day away from home :-)

A truly special gift…and kind too

So I am at a store ‘just looking’ with no real intention of buying- I didn’t like most of what was displayed.

So I hear this beautiful music playing in the store and I ask to be shown the cover of the CD- they were prayers being sung to Guru Nanak.

So, this sales assistant just hands me a brand new CD- as a GIFT!!!

I seriously haven’t ever come across this kind of generosity, especially not in Delhi, especially not by sales assistants who are openly rude if you decide not to buy anything from their store. I insisted on paying- he insisted that I not pay him for a gift.

I am truly touched. I will have to pass on this gesture of kindness.

Retail Therapy and a Birthday Present

Well, why not? It’s the perfect way to relieve any kind of pain, especially if one’s birthday is approaching and one wants to feel good and one’s husband wants them to feel good.

So one tags three children along- wow that sure is a great way to feel fabulous. Hoping against hope, that I would be allowed at least five minutes to check out a couple of tees at M & S, I trudged in with three kids of various ages and a stroller. But as it WAS hope against hope, it was not to materialize. So, I took all to the food court to fill their stomachs before anything else.

Of course there was a gigantic video gaming arcade and another huge area with rides...K just had to get on. So I just had to say no. And so on it went, till…of course I screamed at them and then to make up, I let them go on the rides

Tried to find a pair of shoes for myself (yes the same old shoe story), but in the third Hush Puppies store, could not find a single pair in my size. So just imagine my disappointment- I guess some of you can while my own darling A just can’t. The funny thing is that if such a thing had happened to him, he would’ve been mouthing obscenities at one and all refusing to buy shoes forever.

But because it’s me, I am not allowed. That’s the funny thing about A.

So, here I am now feeling sad sad sad, when a couple of minutes back I was so happy inside having spent some serious time and some serious money on books.

Maybe a birthday present, instead of all the THINGS would be a promise- something he will keep, not to just say things. The worst thing about this habit- it’s just between him and me. Now that’s truly special!!!

Apart from the fact we love each other to bits and would do anything for the other.

My Blog is Personal

And is about personal issues, so if anyone has an issue with that, please don’t read it. This  should be the statutory warning accompanying my blog. To borrow from Meera Syal, life is not ha ha hee hee, and these posts reflects that.

I suddenly realized this as I sent my blog link to an acquaintance…most of what I write about are very personal  things which touch my everyday life; stuff that most people might not be interested in. I am not trying to dissuade the millions who follow me in to not reading me, just…warning: read at your own risk.

Devil in Disguise!

No this time, it’s not the lovely other woman in my life- my mother-in-law, although she more than fits the bill; believe it or not, it’s actually for me.

So why? Trust me, when I started writing this post, I had plenty to write about but between then and now, my two haven’t slept although it’s way past their bedtime (how will the older one get into his school routine from tomorrow?), have managed to infuriate me beyond belief- yes I know they are angelic, sweet, little children) and just turned my evening plans (that of settling down finally and comfortably in front of my macbook) upside down.

I can carry on through the day, but come late evening, I just want someone to wave a magic wand and put them to bed in a jiffy. Which I guess one would be able to- just turn around and switch the light off as one murmurs ‘good night’, just as they show in the movies, if and it’s a big if, they had their own rooms. But, and it’s a big but (ha) ((one must absolutely read Arabella Weir’s Does My Bum Look big in This?)). So coming back to this bummer, such is not the case so one just has to be a devil (now I get why I started writing this one, phew) and brave it somehow…

A Day of Migraine!

For all those who suffer from them my sincere whatever it is one says to fellow sufferers. I had a bad one yesterday and am still kind of recovering from it.

New Age Birthday Parties….Two posts in one!

Are definitely not my cup of tea, or rather my flute of champagne as I discovered the last couple of times, I was invited to a birthday party from K’s school.

I grew up in a home where my mother lovingly invited all friends and family for food, which she made with a great amount of effort and even more love. We had good food, great presents and a fun party. Of course, I’m sure even then, people with more money did a lot more than ‘just’ this much.

All the four birthday parties that my husband and I have organized for my nearly five year old have been along the same lines. I have cooked every single thing that was served, whether it was mini pizzas, mini quiches, fruit tarts, dips, Indian dishes, all except the cakes. We have sat down and planned each and every detail, okay I will admit, the detail freak that I am, I have planned it to the last minutae and my dear husband has gone along with all of it. So, we’ve made funky invites, have had very well thought out activities for the guests (of course, now it’s such a huge business to organize kiddie parties  that I am toying with the idea of making some moolah on the side), booze for the parents (though not of the champagne variety- lots of good old fashioned beer), and return gifts to take back home.

I was and still am dead against doing what everyone does- going to Allied stores in Khan market, give them a budget, get their tattoo maker, their magician and their standard return gifts. I want to be more involved in any party I throw, may it be for four year olds, and therefore I think we do come out tops even when compared to the two most recent parties I went to.

One was at this gigantic farmhouse straight out of the magazines- the winning houses I mean. It was an amazingly done up house, a bit cold from all that designer vibe, but better looking than most 5 star hotels, better equipped, better staffed as well. Hell, the kid had his own set of ginormous swing set in one of their lawns. The food was great, the champagne flowed like rivers after rains and the live band was more than decent. But the company could have done with loads of improvement.

We had gone thinking we’d be meeting other parents, but it turned out to be a maids only party. Why would the parents not want to meet other parents? I still don’t know the answer to this question. But K and A had a good time…

The second was organized at hired premises in one of the malls. Okay- not bad as an idea. But bad idea to have  a pirate party for a 3 year old little girl who showed no interest in being a pirate or anything else. I am sure she would’ve been happier playing in a giant dollhouse with a quieter set of kids. The parents had called all their friends with or without children. Overheard one mother cribbing to her husband about the weekly holiday of their poor maid- I am sure it is absolutely the pits to actually spend quality time with your little one when you can sit and down some champagne and bitch about who’s wearing what!

A and I also had a decent time, mostly because K and A did as well in the play area. They could’ve easily thrown a party for their friends and a much smaller one for their precious one.

The common thing between the two parties- the money being thrown around, the bling brigade (I-have-a-birkin-while-you-don’t), the classless (yeah I am a snob) ensembles, the hideous boots which of course all have to wear(ugg!!!) and the complete non involvement of the parents in the details.

But I guess most don’t notice- you have either to be there to notice or you are too drunk to!

The point of this really long post? Well, just the scale at which things are happening now and the bigger question as to how to keep your child grounded- he does go to school with these kids who so clearly inhabit another planet! 

Chandni Chowk Pix

Here are some pictures from our visit to CC on the last day of the year just gone by.

kinari bazaar

the narrow narrow lanes 

look..it's a handpump!

deep fried paranthas

Just one of the shops selling paranthas

New Year Resolutions

Have you made any? Coz I haven't really sat down and written them down or even specified them in my head. I just know some things I really want and am going to be working for; some ways I am definitely not going to behave- I think it's I grew up and stopped being angry with the world (he he).
The last year saw me spiraling down an emotional roller coaster from where it seemed impossible to climb back but I did with a tremendous amount of support from A. The last year also defined a lot of equations on the familial plane and made me realise some very old sayings- power becomes powerful only when it is acknowledged or some such thing? It is true.
I also realised that it's my family finally and nothing should affect me except for these guys.
Last year was also an year of patch ups with my sisters, on some levels superficially, on some very elementary levels therefore very important.
And oh, will try and start driving.

Saying goodbye to 2010

So we said goodbye to the year that's about to expire with a trip to the oldest part of this city- Old Delhi. Considering that I was born and brought up here, a trip to Chandni Chowk- the first in 35 years seemed like a good idea. Of course it also involved carting our two babies in an extremely crowded place, something they are not really used to. Which is probably why, for the first five minutes of getting out of the car, my older one refuses to walk on the 'spit of others'! Well I can't really blame him as this is what I have been drumming into them when we walk on the road, "Mind where you walk...; look carefully, don't want you walking in crap...blah blah blah!"

But we persevered, got him walking though got to hear this litany all through: I want to go back to New Delhi. This apart, the experience wasn't all that bad. In fact it was pretty good, exciting even (gives one an excellent insight into my super adventurous life). We got to see a part of Delhi that is so integral to this city and yet, doesn't really touch us on an everyday basis. I completely agreed with my dear husband when he said to me, knowing fully well my inherited fear of crowded places," Mala, it's so crowded that it's freeing in a way."

So what exactly did we do?
Initially with a lot of hesitation and later with more excitement we walked the narrow 'gallies'(lanes) of Kinari Bazaar with all kinds of sarees- bridal and otherwise, laces, buttons and many more embellishments, many that I have never seen before. The lane forked out to Malliwara on the right and Galli Paranthe Wali (the lane of paranthas- indian bread). The obvious choice was the latter having so heard so much about it, having wanted to see it forever. So we followed our noses and found ouselves facing a shop where paranthas were being fried in all their glory. Now the normal way of cooking this flat indian bread involves cooking it with just enough oil/butter on a girdle. So imagine my surprise when I saw them being stuffed with very dangerous looking chopped green chillies and then deep fried in smoking hot oil! Now that is what I call a fatal combo and a principal reason, I am guessing that the majority of people in this part of Delhi being in the shape or the lack of it.
There were quite a few shops with their own regular thronging the shops. There were all kinds of vegetables being used to stuff the paranthas- from the regular cauliflower, radish, potato to the never seen before green chillies, pumpkin, papads and many more outlandish (to my ears) items.
We didn't indulge ourselves with this deep fried road to blocked arteries but another later on! We chose the more mundane samosa, which by the way was out of this world at this place called Kanwarji's. I also bought some sweets the kind I have never seen before- baby rasgullahs is our name for it.

I also bought some lace for one tenth the price I buy in the common south Delhi markets. We had a great time and I guess it's a bit- addictive as A and I were already talking about a return visit.
The other things we really enjoyed were a plate of tikkis, yes I know they are deep fried, but it's once in a very long while and what the hell a little bit of fat (!) did nobody any harm. If you have it in the right places, you might even become a porn figure in the cooking world, hello Nigella! Actually I don't really know which is worse, raw beef steaks or tikkis- give me tikkis any day.
So yes, we gobbled down a plate of amazing tikkis, thin and crisp and not potato-ey at all. They are an absolute must.
My expat friends make fun of me and mostly everyone is so surprised to learn that I had never been to Old Delhi before, just as I would make fun of them saying all they wanted to see was character and therefore dirt and filth. But I am quite happy to say I was wrong and they were right- it's something to be experienced for sure.
And I am equally happy to say we are going back again...right now time to sanitise my four year old's shoes- he absolutely insists!
And oh yeah- a very happy 2011 to my millions of fans.